It wasn’t until I was in an EMDR training that I realized I had some trauma.
You see, when you are a clinician and you go to trainings you have to work on something. Since EMDR is a trauma resolution therapy technique, I had to look around inside me for something to work on. And the more I looked, the more I found. And it shocked me. I had never, ever thought of myself as having trauma. A few rough spots in my life? Yes. Trauma? No way.
Over the years I have collected some wounds…because that is what trauma really is: a wound. But trauma? It turns out the answer to that question is yes.
So, I started a list. Some of you in the know will recognize this as a trauma timeline, or a target list.
My parents divorced before I was 5. I was bullied at age 7 by my step-sister and one of her friends when I was visiting my dad for the summer. I was kicked in the mouth by a horse and had my jaw broken and teeth knocked out at age 13. My mother’s best friend, whom I loved and looked up to, was murdered when I was 15. I was in a very bad car accident, broke my right arm, and lost the use of my hand at 16. I did recover. Oh, yes. And we moved. A lot. More than a dozen times throughout my childhood.
Death has taken my animals many times. Horses, dogs, and cats that I have loved wholeheartedly. I expect to be love-trampled when I cross over to the other side.
My grandmother died when I was 25 and I was very, very close to her. My mother had a brain aneurysm and very nearly died when I was 28. Major stressor. My father died unexpectedly in 2006, and my horse, who I had raised from a baby, died shortly after my dad. My husband’s best friend, and my dear friend, died in a plane crash in 2013. News of his death was bad enough. Add to that the fact that it was highly publicized and I was to be confronted with the fiery footage of the plane’s fall from the sky and the explosion over and over again and I would definitely call that trauma.
I have lost two loved ones to suicide.
Those are the highlights. Add to that various and sundry other things like numerous falls from horses, other sports injuries, failed romances, and fender benders here and there…that sort of garden variety stuff.
Did I ever consider myself traumatized? Never.
Did I consider myself wounded? You must be kidding.
I was raised to suck it up. I was taught that many, many people were less fortunate than I and my job was to get on with my life and live it. And my mother always told me that we were all here on earth to help each other.
So that’s what I did. I had fun, loved my horses, had some adventures, and loved my life. I was pretty happy. I eventually found the last love of my life, and we have been blessed with a wonderful daughter.
It took me a long time to figure out who and what I wanted to be when I grew up. In fact, it took me 26 years to complete my Bachelor’s degree. It’s hard to do that quickly when you are squashing so much fun into the middle of it.
But by then I had started to figure myself out. So I graduated with my Bachelor’s on a Monday and started my Master’s in Counseling on that Wednesday. That was 2005. I completed that and two specializations in two years flat, because now I knew what I wanted to do: help people. And now I knew how. That inspired me to go on for my doctorate. As a result, I have worked with hundreds of individuals, groups, and families in hospitals, agencies, schools, universities, and private practice.
It would take me until 2014 before I would discover and train in EMDR. And it took a little longer before I dug in and decided I wanted to develop mastery in this amazing therapy technique. And there are a lot of stories in between there and here.
But what is salient for this part of the story is that I was truly shocked to realize that I carried trauma. And it wasn’t until that first training in EMDR that I realized it. And after I started using it, I began to see miracles happen right in front of me.
I watch people change right in front of my eyes and it is miraculous.
I was called to be a grief and trauma therapist after seeing so many people suffering from PTSD. I was frustrated and wanted to know what the heck to do about it. That’s how I found EMDR and read David Grand’s book, Emotional Healing at Warp Speed: The Power of EMDR. It is a page-turner and I was hooked. When I learned about IADC I was determined to get trained in EMDR. It has changed my life.
EMDR is a game changer. Don’t be afraid to look at your past and do the work. You’ve already lived through it once and you made it through. Be brave and trust in yourself. You have the power to change your life, so take the first step and contact me. Don’t wait. I’m excited about talking to you.
Your life is precious and your time for change is now.
My training, education, and experience are the tools you can use to get you where you want to go.
- Licensed Professional Counselor and PhD Candidate
- EMDRIA Certified Therapist
- EMDRIA Approved Consultant
- Specialized training in trauma, grief and loss, anxiety, couples and families, groups, infertility, mindfulness, distress tolerance, and emotional regulation
- Thirteen years of experience helping hundreds of clients transform their lives for the better
- On the never-ending journey to learn more so I can serve my clients even better
Licensure
Licensed Professional Counselor
State of Oregon ID Number C2930
Licensed Professional Counselor
State of Michigan ID Number 6401010544
Education
Licensed Professional Counselor
National Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor
EMDRIA Certified Therapist
EMDRIA Approved Consultant
